Sixteen Years

Wow, Duncan, has it really been 16 years since you came into our lives? That doesn't seem possible. Didn't we tell you you were always supposed to stay that cute chubby cheeked little boy with the big grin? When did you get to be taller than me, and who told you that was okay?

Most people probably look at you and see a tall skinny 16 year old kid with a lot of catching up to do. A kid who is obsessed with video games, has terrible table manners, doesn't talk much, and whose social skills are lacking to say the least. Other people see a kid with messy hair, who wears the same clothes day after day, who avoids eye contact whenever possible, and who keeps to himself as much as he can.

But when I look at you, I see somebody who, in all of the important ways, is leaps and bounds ahead of most of the rest of us. I see a 16 year old kid who is the most generous and kind hearted person I have ever met. A kid who loves his family, and is known to put himself last in order to make peace. I see a kid who orders a mean kitchen sink at Angie's Restaurant. I see a kid with amazing faith, and amazing courage, who gets out of bed every morning and takes on the world every day with an extra load on your back called autism. It isn't fair that you have to carry that extra load around with you every day, and everywhere you go. Sometimes I wonder what you would be like without it. But that is a hard question to answer, because autism is part of who you are.

It's only one part though. Maybe for the rest of your life, it will be a challenge to get other people to see past the autism, to what you really are- funny, warm, smart, dependable and stubborn. I hope you find people who will keep trying.

So Happy Birthday Dunc-man! What would we do if we didn't have you?