our parallel universe

I have come to the conclusion that a parallel universe does indeed exist, and my children live there. It explains a lot about them, like why they see nothing very strange about the bathroom sink being full of cat food, or why they think it is perfectly acceptable to wash off the dog with the kitchen sponge. It also appears, in this parallel universe, that there is some kind of societal ban on closing any kind of door, including kitchen cupboards and drawers. And, it must also be inhabited by aliens who do all of the things at our house that nobody knows anything about, like who put the cat food in the bathroon sink, or who ate all of the Rocky Road ice cream, or who lost that important paper that Dad left lying on top of the fridge.
Yep, my parallel universe theory explains a lot. But wait. Maybe I've got it all wrong. Maybe I am the one in the parallel universe. Maybe I am the alien.

Ok, Olivia just poured water all over me. Maybe she needs some attention. Or maybe SHE is the alien.
Potty training sucks.